The good life is built with good relationships.
Robert J. Waldinger
About the author
Robert J. Waldinger serves as the director of one of the longest-running studies of adult life ever conducted. Born in 1951, Waldinger graduated from Harvard College and Harvard Medical School, then completed his psychiatry residency at Massachusetts Mental Health Center.
His famous quote gained worldwide attention during his 2015 TED Talk titled “What Makes a Good Life? Lessons from the Longest Study on Happiness,” which has been viewed more than 50 million times, making it one of the most popular TED Talks ever.
The Harvard Study began in 1938 and has tracked the lives of 724 men for over 80 years, analysing their health, careers, relationships, and overall well-being. Waldinger represents the fourth director of this groundbreaking research project.
The meaning of the quote
This quote cuts through mountains of self-help advice to reveal a simple truth: our connections with others form the foundation of a fulfilling life. The Harvard Study that Waldinger directs found that close relationships, more than money or fame, keep people happy throughout their lives.
The research shows people with stronger social connections experienced less mental decline with age, maintained better physical health, and lived longer than people with fewer connections. Even more surprisingly, the level of satisfaction in relationships at age 50 proved a better predictor of physical health than cholesterol levels.
How to apply this wisdom:
My friend Julia tried this approach after moving to a new city for work. Rather than focusing solely on her career, she joined a weekly cooking class and invited neighbours over for simple meals. Within a year, she had built a close social circle. When she later faced a health crisis, these same connections provided meals, rides to appointments, and emotional support that proved life-changing.
The quality of relationships matters more than quantity. Research participants who had conflict-filled relationships suffered more health problems than those with fewer but more supportive connections.
As Waldinger puts it, good relationships literally protect our bodies and brains.
Leave feedback about this