I once watched my six-year-old nephew have a complete meltdown over a broken toy car. His parents tried everything: they offered to buy him a new one, attempted to distract him with other toys, and even explained how the wheel could be glued back on. Nothing worked. Then his grandmother sat down beside him, looked… Read More »How to make someone feel seen and heard
For years, I failed the circle of hell test without even knowing it existed. I’d see someone hovering at the edge of a conversation, clearly wanting to join, and I’d do nothing. I’d continue talking, pretending not to notice their awkward half-smile and shifting weight. I told myself pulling strangers into our group chat wasn’t… Read More »The circle of hell test
We’ve all been there. The knot in your stomach as you wait for a meeting you know will be unpleasant. The racing heart and sweaty palms as you try to find the right words. The sinking feeling as a conversation goes off the rails despite your best efforts. Difficult conversations are unavoidable, but for most… Read More »How to do difficult conversations
You know that sinking feeling when a conversation with your partner veers into the “You always…” zone? Maybe you’re dishing those statements out yourself, watching your loved one’s face fall with each accusation. I’ve been on both sides of that interaction. And let me tell you, it never ends well. I certainly made my share… Read More »Use “I feel” statements for better relationships
For most of my life, I thought arguing was about proving I was right. I’d latch onto my viewpoint with a death grip, using every rhetorical trick to defend it. Evidence that contradicted my stance? Brushed aside. Holes in my logic? Hastily patched. The other person’s perspective? Dismissed with a wave. I argued to win,… Read More »How to argue using the RISA framework
Truly listening to others has become a rare and valuable skill. Many of us fall into the trap of letting our minds wander during conversations, missing out on important information and failing to make genuine connections. By learning to listen actively and intentionally, we can transform our relationships and become more effective communicators. The key… Read More »The Assist-to-Steal ratio in conversations
Emotional intelligence is the secret sauce that allows us to navigate complex emotions, build meaningful connections, and thrive personally and professionally. While some might believe that emotional intelligence is an innate gift, the truth is that it can be cultivated and strengthened through the power of language. When used consistently and authentically, certain phrases can… Read More »8 phrases to show empathy and strengthen your relationships
A simple yet powerful framework can help us navigate conversations with greater skill and care. By applying the 4-Way Test to our interactions, we can cultivate more meaningful connections, build trust, and achieve better outcomes in both personal and professional spheres. The 4-Way Test, originally developed by Herbert J. Taylor to guide ethical decision-making in… Read More »The 4-way test for better communication
One simple technique in public speaking can significantly impact your ability to captivate and engage your audience: the purposeful pause. By strategically incorporating well-timed moments of silence into your speech, you can eliminate the overuse of filler words like “um,” “ah,” and “you know,” which often creep into our language when we’re feeling nervous or… Read More »How to get rid of your um’s and ah’s
Conversational receptiveness is a communication approach that involves using specific words, phrases, and techniques to demonstrate engagement with and understanding of the other person’s perspective during a conversation, particularly in situations of disagreement or conflict. It aims to create a more open, respectful, and productive dialogue by focusing on listening, acknowledging the other person’s viewpoint,… Read More »The HEAR technique for better communication and solving conflicts
