Scientists who study couples in conflict labs have noticed something strange: partners rarely fight about what they think they’re fighting about. That argument that starts with “You never take out the trash” or “Why didn’t you call me back?” almost never ends there. Within minutes, couples spiral into accusations about respect, care, and whether they… Sigue leyendo "The 90-10 Rule of Conflict
I stood in the middle of Mark’s massive penthouse, staring out at the skyline through floor-to-ceiling windows. Everything around me screamed success. Expensive art on the walls, designer furniture, and a kitchen that would make a professional chef jealous. “Pretty amazing place you’ve got here,” I said, accepting the glass of wine he handed me.… Sigue leyendo "Make connecting a habit
What’s the secret to a happy, lasting relationship? Some say it’s compatibility and having common values, goals and interests to bond over. Others claim the key is physical chemistry and passion. Still others emphasize acts of service, gift-giving, or quality time. While all those factors matter, there’s a foundational element that often gets overlooked: Good… Sigue leyendo "The 20-minute connection ritual every couple needs
We’ve all been there. The knot in your stomach as you wait for a meeting you know will be unpleasant. The racing heart and sweaty palms as you try to find the right words. The sinking feeling as a conversation goes off the rails despite your best efforts. Difficult conversations are unavoidable, but for most… Sigue leyendo "Cómo mantener conversaciones difíciles
My default mode when friends or family share their struggles has always been to fix things. I’m a problem-solver by nature, so my mind immediately starts analyzing the situation and generating solutions. But over the years, this approach created friction in my relationships. I’d offer suggestions and insights, only to be met with resistance or… Sigue leyendo "Do you want to be helped, heard or hugged?
You know that sinking feeling when a conversation with your partner veers into the “You always…” zone? Maybe you’re dishing those statements out yourself, watching your loved one’s face fall with each accusation. I’ve been on both sides of that interaction. And let me tell you, it never ends well. I certainly made my share… Sigue leyendo "Use “I feel” statements for better relationships
Our relationships are scattered across countless digital albums and social media memories. But those frozen moments hold the key to deepening our real-life connections. When we treat our photo collections as a gateway to conversation rather than a graveyard of the past, they become a tool for keeping our bonds vibrant and alive. Our cameras… Sigue leyendo "Use your photos to reconnect with your loved ones
Early in my marriage, conversations with my spouse often left me feeling resentful and unappreciated. I couldn’t understand why my partner wasn’t meeting my needs despite my constant reminders of what I wanted. Sound familiar? It took me years to realize I was going about it all wrong. I wasn’t expressing my needs effectively. Demanding… Sigue leyendo "Make requests, not demands
A los dos años de casada, la fase de luna de miel terminó con un choque silencioso y repentino. De repente, todo lo que antes me resultaba entrañable de mi marido, ahora me ponía de los nervios. Dejar calcetines sucios en el suelo, olvidarse de sacar la basura, masticar demasiado alto... cada pequeña irritación se acumulaba hasta que me encontré preguntándome: "¿Qué...? Sigue leyendo "Elige amar a tu pareja (en los momentos difíciles)
Todos hemos pasado por eso: un amigo llama llorando, un familiar comparte una noticia devastadora, un compañero de trabajo se derrumba en la oficina. En esos momentos desgarradores, está dolorosamente claro: no puedes arreglar su angustia con un chasquido de dedos. El dolor es real y crudo. Los consejos y las soluciones, por muy bienintencionados que sean, a menudo suenan a hueco.... Sigue leyendo "7 frases para consolar a alguien en crisis
